Thursday, January 21, 2010

The world's worst attitude about camp.

Haha. So, GARY! turned me onto the fact that Mortified - a hilarious variety hour of sorts, which showcases real people's awkward diary entries, love letters, anti-math teacher manifestos and etc. from their adolescence - is having auditions in Austin this weekend.

I emailed Mom yesterday to see if she could dig up any of my old letters from camp.

Now Reader, if we have ever met in real life, you probably thought: "Overall, Tolly is a fairly positive person."  "Overall, Tolly has a smile on her face."  But you would be missing one very crucial truth, and that truth friends is this:

Sometimes, I have a really, really bad attitude about things.  Sometimes I am whiny.  And, slightly melodramatic.  (Like with folding and putting away laundry. I hate it. It's like the laundry exists purely to inconvenience my life, and takes time away from doing IMPORTANT things.  Such as Twitter.  Or...text messages.  Yeah. Twitter and text messages.  Thanks a lot for preventing these two  extremely important things, LAUNDRY).

Anyhoo, below are some letters home from my first overnight camp, stationed, ironically, in Utopia, Texas.  Heh. Utopia indeed. 

(Note: Purrsilla is my cat).

Finally, this is a letter cat.  (Purrsilla/Prissila - she had a couple of different spellings). I don't think I wrote it at camp.   If any of you know Claudia, my current cat, you might recognize the EXACT sentiment in this letter that I have towards her now (smothering).


nina said...

Upon seeing the scribbled out part, and the instructions to NEVERMIND THIS, Prisilla’s purriosity did finally get to her, and though she was the cutest kitten in the world, and that should have been enough, she would spend the rest of her yarn-chasing days with a subtle, but gnawing void as to what pathway that original message held for her and what stories could have unfolded had she read it.

Mean Rachel said...

oh my gawd! Love this. More Tolly letters!

nina said...

totally, i adore these

Ashley Cass said...

I concur, more Tolly letters.

Gary said...

So when you emailed these to me last night I actually did a dramatic reading for Andrew and Happy in my living room. It was kinda awesome. After i stopped laugh-crying that your cat was named Purrcilla i couldn't help but stare at your awesome art work. Is that a bird eating a caterpillar? ;) How old were you when this was written?

Anyways love love love them.


Anonymous said...

I hope you can make it out to the auditions!


Breanna said...

I hope you never, never die.

Hipstercrite said...

AHH! I love it! You have to go to the audition! This post made my day.

"Julie" said...

omg that's hysterical! love it!

purrsilla....genius name.

Amanda said...

I've been fuming at work all day over various issues, one of which being no natural light, but this made me laugh :)

Thank you for excellent timing!

Austin Eavesdropper said...

Haha, hey guys! I'm glad y'all liked these. I'll see if Mom can find some more.

I just realized what the scratched-out part of my letter to Purrsilla was. Apparently, I had started to write a song about her, and it went something like this:

"The cutest kitten in the world..."

Much like the theme of the letter. But then I guess I gave up, and got embarrassed. Embarrassed to show my cat.

(Only children like myself tend to have over-attachment issues with pets).

Gary - LOL, a bird eating a caterpillar!! I'm pretty sure that's my duck stuffed animal hanging out with my baby blanket. (Bates, spelled "Batse" above, was the name of my baby blanket. Like the motel).

And to answer your question, I think I was 7-8 when I wrote these? Haha. Quite miserly ("I think their stuff is a rip-off") for a 7-8 year old.

Grant said...

You have inspired me. I wrote tons of camp letters. Time to call up the parents. I miss my cat. Tank, where ever you, are I am sorry I let that bitch take you away from me.

Anonymous said...

this is sooo awesome because i just brought back 5 of my diaries dating back from 1995!!!

there IS some embarassing things in there haha.

Spatzi said...

Hehehe. Fantastic.

Michelle said...

Oh my god, I just died of the cute a little bit. AWESOME.