Hey! The Zooey Deschanel Show

Oh my God.

My dear friend (and fellow Mortified alum) Ted just turned me onto this: Hey! The Zooey Deschanel Show. 

Somehow he must have read my mind, and already have known how much I enjoy VeryMaryKate.com.  Because this brilliant Zooey version has me in stitches.




I mean, right! 

The show was created by Austinite Noël Kristi Wells, who also submitted the following -- and if possible, even more awesome -- audition video to Saturday Night Live.

The celeb imitations are pretty great, but I think I like the Austin hipster imitation (the last one to appear) the best! 

Locals (and Williamsburg, Brooklyn natives), we all know this person.  Hell, some of us are this person.


Oh, the Justin Bieber character ... it's a close tie for me, in terms of favorite, between Austin hipster ("yeah, so, technically, I'm a pescatarian") and Justin Bieber ("ooh!  Girl!")

Also. This next thing is completely off-topic. 

But, look what I just learned to do by accident on my keyboard:

ç

Maybe you didn't catch that.

ç

So fancy!

Life is too short to have an ugly blog.

Guess what, everybody. Revelations are falling out of the sky and into my brain!

After three years of blogging, I have come to the sensible conclusion that I cannot design a blog to save my life.

This is no small matter.  If I'm going to be looking at my blog every day, I want something attractive to to look at.  Blogs may be more than skin-deep, but I'm a pro-skin kinda gal.  And, I like my surfaces shiny and pretty.

So!  I am stating two things here, in a very public way, so as to increase accountability.  Or something.  Is this how AA works?   If so, let's pretend you are a "Sponsor."  And I am the "Addict."  Addicted to blog laziness, only putting in the least amount of effort required to grow and sustain a readership.  I hope you're ready for the responsibility, Sponsors.

Here are my two promises to you:

1. I will freaking make over this blog.  It shocks me sometimes that anyone reads Austin Eavesdropper.  I know that sounds irritatingly like false modesty, but what I mean is, I know how many great blogs are out there.  Blogs that are fun to read, as well as gaze upon.

It's also dawned on me that perhaps this blog isn't as functional as it could be.  I never approached Austin Eavesdropper with a master plan, but maybe I should have.  The way it started was, I was sitting on the couch about three years ago, and said: "Looks like I've seen this Seinfeld rerun. Guess I'll make a blog." And then it appeared.

I had no idea what this blog would be "about," but then Austin revealed herself to be the glittering muse that she is, and soon I had a blog "theme." Since then I've mustered up the motivation to create little categories -- please refer to the mustaches on the right side of your screen -- but again, these are only halfway helpful, I think.  There are blogs I adore, like A Beautiful Mess and SF Girl By Bay, who have more extensive, easily navigable categories.  Austin Eavesdropper could (AND SHALL) benefit from their model.

2. This blogger needs a new camera.  Obviously.  I still love my baby Canon PowerShot, a wedding gift Ross and I received three years ago.  But if I'm going to devote this time in my life to documenting Austin, and my experience in this very special city, it's only appropriate to upgrade my tools.  When I look back, I want the soft gauze of this chapter to be created by nostalgia, not by pixelation.

Here is the camera I've got my eye on.  If you have a better suggestion by all means tell me.  (As long as it wouldn't require more photography knowledge than your average 3rd grader or for me to donate my existing limbs to science.)

In the meantime.  I've created a "vision board," so to speak, of images that I want to shape my blog's new design.  (Why do I always lapse into The Secret-like speech whenever I make goals?)  Here they are.

Images courtesy Design Crisis (run by two Austin ladies).  I love these muted colors, with the weird, almost collage-like compositions.

Left to my own devices, this might be how I would decorate a house. Because my husband is not gay, this probably won't come to pass.

I have looooooved Miranda July for a long time.  Ever since Me and You and Everyone We Know came out, and I realized she was part visual artist, part filmmaker, part sage. 

If I ever gain either A) influence or B) a genie, the first thing I do will be to invite Miranda July to my home, where we'll write on things and basically be awesome together.  In the meantime, she'll have to settle for my vision board.

I hope the subtlety hasn't been lost on you here; I really like birds.

What's with the recent fascination I've taken to birds?  I have one tattooed on my neck.  They've perched themselves on this blog's very header.  I have them all around my house in the form of wall decals and artwork.  I'm not sure where it's all come from, but one thing I do know: Birds will be a part of my new-and-improved blog.  They don't even have a choice!

(Thanks to Gennine's Art Blog for the images).

So there you have it.  Those are my creative goals for the next few months.  As the post title says, life is too short to have an ugly blog!  So ugly mine shall be no longer.  Or at least, not much longer.

what creative projects are you tackling right now?

Home for the holidays.

I come from one of the goofiest families of all time. 

And, Christmas is one of those times when my heritage is in full effect.

This is my dad.  He has huge facial expressions.  Both he and my mom love to laugh, making them excellent subjects for Christmas morning photography. 

Here is my mom receiving a DVD for Christmas.  Note how my dad is ALREADY giggling.  What do you think the DVD is?  National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation?  Something starring Tim Allen?

HELL NAW.  We all watched this as a family last night.

I love my mom's facial expression here.  It's like she's saying, "aaayy, whatsa matta?"  She gave my dad a remote-controlled car for Christmas, and Ross got one, too.

Yoga kittens!

My dad gave Mom a new potato peeler, but he was so proud of it (see video below) that he posed with it for the camera.

Ross gave me a little Zoom video camera this year!  So I could more easily record shows, and display them on my blog.  Also, my parents, Ross' parents, and I pitched in to get Ross a Kindle DX, which prompted him to make fun of me and my old-fashioned paper books all night.

Me, baking.  I made someone get a camera.

Ross got concerned, so he came over to help me. 

I took a photograph of my mom's famed Cheese Grits recipe I was telling you about.
It's shockingly easy.

I don't know what my dad is doing here.

And -- below.  My first video with the Zoom camera Ross gave me.  I shot it in weird lighting!  But as you can see, my dad's exuberance over his Mom's new potato peeler cannot be repressed, even by overhead darkness.

The best thing you ever tasted.

People, what is the best thing you ever tasted?

I ask because you are likely with your families right now, or other people you love.  At least, I hope you are.  Are any of you still working?  Do me a favor.  Walk over to your boss, and kick him/her.  Then, proceed to the nearest exit.  Yay!

Anyway.  When we're around the people we love, we tend to eat really well.  I think this happens for two reasons.  A) Preparing good food is, for many, an expression of love, and B) from the eater's side, we actually let ourselves linger over what has been cooked for us.  And, lingering is a key component of eating well.  A component I fail at, grandly, but a component all the same.

This is me, "cooking."   I'm pretty sure I burnt this.

Here in Austin, we are blessed with a really thriving foodie culture.  There is much enthusiasm with little snobbery.  Perhaps it's because we are a relatively new culinary center, and truth be told, are still probably quite far off from being a New York or a San Francisco.  I mean, I guess?  Those two are always held up as THE American eating cities, but is that just the rich people talking?  Could be.

However, let's assume for now that San Francisco and New York host some badass chefs (fact) and diners who actively seek out amazing food (fact).  The difference between places like those, and places like Austin, is -- I think -- an issue of play.  We take food seriously here ... sort of.  All I have to say is "food trailer," and you know what I'm talking about. 

Still.  What those cities have over Austin, probably, is a set of vigorously practiced culinary traditions.  Tradition is powerful.  It is very comforting.  As we near the holidays, you are likely spooning up big mouthfuls of tradition as I write this post.

Food "play" and food "tradition" are two different concepts, and the reason I bring up tradition, juxtaposed against play, is because you get so much of the latter, dish-wise, when you eat out.

But the former?  Tradition?  That's not just San Francisco or New York.  That's Mom.

* * *

My mom makes these cheese grits that will bring you to tears (of joy).  She's making them for Christmas in a few days, and they might be the best thing I ever tasted.  Each bite tastes like a mythical South I want to visit, only more decadent -- more naughty.  The top layer of her grits always has a glistening, gooey layer of cheese on top, sheathing the buttery mash below.

In other artery-clogging delights, my dad used to make me this breakfast that he learned in Vietnam, and because it's so bad for you, we don't really eat it anymore.  But S.O.S, or, "Shit on Shingles," is one of those warm tradition foods that totally sends me back.  I remember thick, white sauce, mixed with sausage, poured over Bisquick biscuits.  Such a dad dish.  I loved it when I had a little bit of sauce, and a little bit of biscuit left, and could run the biscuit through the middle of my plate, soaking up the creamy remains. 

Getting to know your favorite foods is no small thing.  It says things about you, your family, the way you treat yourself, the way you deny yourself.  And all the time, we have to keep our favorite foods in such a delicate balance, lest we get sick of them.  Like grilled chicken salad.  Right, dieters?

Things get old.  We have to veer away from our favorite foods, just for the joy of coming back.  So maybe our favorite foods are also our special foods, things we save for occasions, like holidays or birthdays or second dates.  It's corny, but I believe true, that when something has been prepared with love, you can taste the love specifically.

* * *

So what is the best thing you ever tasted?  Here are some of mine.


1. My mom's Browned Brussels Sprouts.  I have a fierce, passionate love for brussels sprouts.  I think they are incredibly tasty steamed, plain, and because I am joined with roughly 2% of the population in this opinion, they are never out-of-stock at the grocery store.  But!  To make them truly mind-blowing, I do what my mom does:

Steam the sprouts first, then when they are "al dente," transfer them to a sauce pan with a generous amount of olive oil.  Saute until brown with lemon pepper.  Lots and lots of lemon pepper.

And then ... you eat them.

It's 5-year-old easy.  But so damn good.

So NOT my brussels sprouts, but I wanted you to get an idea of what we're talking about here.  (And, pine nuts?  Genius).  Thank you SlashFood for the image. 

2. Ross' Ostrich/Lamb Cranberry and Feta Meatloaf.  I am incredibly fortunate to be married to one hell of a cook.  And because of this I don't mind that he watches Giada de Laurentiis with slack-jawed attention, because GUESS WHAT, I get to eat her food.  It's a win-win.

Anyway, Ross takes Giada's recipe for Turkey, Sun-Dried Tomatoes and Feta Meatloaf, and tweaks it.  His version contains the afore-mentioned ostrich and lamb meat combo, since ostrich is incredibly lean, while lamb is incredibly rich and oily.  He combines equal amounts of both in the mixing bowl, and together, the two balance out each other.

Then, he subs out sun-dried tomatoes for dried cranberries, although I've had it with tomatoes before, too, and that is super delicious. Sometimes he adds other crazy things in it like cherries, or curry, or raisins, because meatloaf is accommodating that way.

When he's all done, we totally murder that meatloaf.  Nothing has ever made me feel so gleefully carnivorous as that big pan of baked meat.   Meatloaf has a reputation as "unsexy" food, and it's true -- it's not much to look at.

This is probably the most flattering shot you will ever see of meatloaf.

So, if you make this dish, just close your eyes and take a generous, greedy bite.  Don't look, just taste. 

3.  A dessert at Uchiko called Tobacco Cream.  Ok, I'm cheating.  This dish can obviously be had only by going out, and falls firmly in the "play" (vs. "tradition") camp.  And you're probably not going out to eat anytime soon, since it's the holidays, and if I had my wits about me I would try to tell you about a peppermint or gingerbread some-such ... but, look how pretty!

(Thank you to Orthogonal Thought for the photo.)

Uchiko's Tobacco Cream is made out of choco­late sorbet, maple budino, huck­le­berry, scotch.  Does anyone have any idea what "maple budino" is?   I do not.  All I know is, I ate this during Austin Restaurant Week, and silently freaked out.

Such an aggressive dessert, underneath that pretty presentation.  Smoke, and dark chocolate, and liquor.  Not everyone is a fan of the savory/sweet thing in desserts, but I AM.  Big time.  Give me your salted caramel macchiato, your rosemary apple pie, your bizarre cigar/chocolate dessert inventions!  I'll savor them all!

And you?  What is the best thing you ever tasted?  Ironically, I'm reading a book right now by the same name -- The Best Thing I Ever Tasted, by Sallie Tisdale -- but I'm afraid to report it turns rather whiny at the end! 

But, she did inspire the post, after all.  So cheers, Sallie.

A better resolution: The New Year's Word.

At the beginning of 2010, I decided I was going to treat New Year's a little differently.  Rather than making up a resolution, I came up with a New Year's word.

Going into the New Year in 2010, I realized two things: A) I was too damn busy, and B) among the things I was busy with, I had lost the ability to discern those that I actually wanted to do, and those I felt like I had to do.  So for 2010, I made my word "balance," and in between January through March, the following three things happened:

1) I cut out all of my freelance writing projects,

2) I started going to the Austin Zen Center,

3) I traded my stressful cubicle job for a glorious work-from-home job.

That's basically what happened, anyway.

*  *  *

In March, one of my freelance jobs fired me after I turned in yet another late assignment.  When I realized how much happier I was without the weekly burden of writing for them, I wrote all of my other editors with a cordial, "I quit!" note.  And boom: 15-20 hours/week of my life back.

But before that happened, I was pulling out the hairs on the back of my neck, because that is what I do when I get stressed out.  I got out of the shower one January morning and felt scabs along my hairline at the base of my neck.  I thought, "maybe there's a better way."  So I searched for 'zen' in the podcasts part of my iPhone, found Zencast, downloaded a billion, found Austin Zen Center, and started going.

And before that happened, at the end of 2009,  I announced to Ross: "I'm sorry, it seems you have married a bitch."  Because that is what I was becoming.  I had gone from the laid-back kids' yoga teacher he asked out several years ago, to a constantly on-edge corporate suit.  In my spare moments, I fantasized about writing a tell-all memoir about this one very famous, very horrendous client.  To vent, I started writing lots of fake, unsent emails that began with the salutation "Dear Asshole," detailing all the atrocities they had committed against me.  It was a gross time.  Correction: a gross me.  I started looking for a new job.

And almost immediately after the new year began, in 2010, I got one.  Working less hours.  Working from home.  I am fifty times happier.

This extended rundown of events is my way of saying: The New Year's Word works, people.  There's an alternative to the New Year's Resolution, which all too often ends in disappointment and dashed hopes.  To me, the New Year's Word is looser, yet has an ability to focus all your actions to a single rallying point. And thus, is more effective.

At least, it was for me.  I realize how dangerously close to Law of Attraction territory this blog post is.  Maybe we're there already.  All I know is, once I decided that "balance" would be my word-slash-mantra for 2010, I no longer felt guilty about saying no to stuff, about directly cutting out stuff, about doing less.  Without my special New Year's Word, I might have felt lazy and rather un-American about not striving to do as much as I possibly could; with it, I felt 100% justified.

*  *  *

I was talking to Ross in the car yesterday about what 2011's words might be.  Here's what I've come up with so far:

1. Flexibility.  I have a tendency to visualize in my head how I want the day, or even the next 15 minutes to go, and when it doesn't work out that way,  I get a little peeved.  I think this is probably an only child thing.  For example, yesterday, Ross and I were on our way somewhere, and I asked, "can we stop by Natural Grocer so I can get that special drink I like?" I had already visualized us stopping by Natural Grocer you see, selecting my special drink, and enjoying it on the car ride.  When he said,"no, we're late," I got all silent and indignant and passive-aggressive.  And then when he asked, "is that ok?"  I said, "it is fine" in a way that meant, "NO, NOT FINE, I WANT MY SPECIAL DRINK."

I do this kind of thing all the time. So perhaps 2011 will be Year of Flexibility, yes?

2. Openness.  I began to worry that "flexibility" was slightly negative in its connotation, and that "openness" would be more all-inclusive. Open to the possibility that I won't always get my special drink, open to new experiences, open to whatever.  I'm not completely sold, but it's a contender.

3. Experimentation.  Eh, I know how that sounds.  That's not how I mean it.  I guess this is another way of saying, "Trying New Things!" except the things I want to try aren't entirely new.  I want to experiment with more offline writing, I want to take more dance classes but specifically aerial dance classes, I want to save up my money and maybe, maybe get another tattoo.  I just have one now, and kind of love it.

What will your New Year's Word be?  If I have convinced you, that is, to abandon ye olde New Year's Resolution.  If you do have a resolution though, go ahead and share. No judging, I promise.

THIS WEEKEND: Fashionistas can do their part to stimulate the economy (by shopping).

Some of you may know "eco chic" fashion designer (and my good buddy) René Geneva.  She is a creative force of nature here in Austin, belly dancing and fire eating one minute, teaching the masses how to become designers themselves the next.  And each time we hang out, I keep hoping some of dang artistic talent will rub off on me.

René's stuff always has an easy, layery feel to it -- a little Stevie Nicks, a little Bianca Jagger. Her clothes are all made from sustainable materials, from organic cotton to tree bark, making her somewhat of an Austin fashion darling. 

Now, René and award-winning local designer, Linda Asaf, have joined forces.  The two are sharing a boutique space together on 1405 West Sixth, and this weekend, the two are throwing a little soft launch party.

rené geneva and linda asaf boutique

soft launch opening

saturday and sunday

11am - 7pm

special discounts * food * drinks

Here are some of the looks you'll see inside the store, which carries everything from comfy casual (think yoga pants) to seasonal staples (eco-friendly coats).

More photos are available on the event page. Where you may see someone you recognize.

One of my favorite, favorite things René makes are these slouchy hip purses -- with a big, wide belt, and and a paperback-sized pouch to hold your stuff.  I wish I had a picture to show you so you can see what I'm talking about!  You can see a black one in the second-to-last pic above, but I adore the brown ones, not shown.  Oh well.  That just means you'll have to go in and see them for yourselves!  Just don't buy too many, because I may do a little Merry-Christmas-to-me trip there today.

"Magic everywhere in this bitch."

Yesterday, The Onion's A.V. Club ran a brief about forthcoming Terence Malick film Tree of Life, shot just outside Austin in Smithville, Texas.  That headline you see above is theirs, not mine, but it was so good I couldn't resist using it.  (And furthermore, our very own Sean O'Neal -- editor of A.V. Club Austin -- authored said piece and presumably, headline).

Watching this trailer is a little like watching NOVA in the beginning, and then Brad Pitt, and then the 1950s, and then Sean Penn?  I'm not 100% sure what it's about.  But it looks Oscar baity.




Fun facts about Tree of Life's filming in Smithville:

• It's also where that Sandra Bullock movie, Hope Floats, was filmed.
• The namesake of Tree of Life is a 65,000 pound tree in Smithville.
• A local Smithville dog named Dexter plays Brad Pitt's family dog in the movie.
• While Brad was filming (do you like how we're on a first-name basis?  Me and ol' Brad?), Angelina Jolie was interviewed by Vanity Fair at our Four Seasons.

I will probably see Tree of Life.  But I don't know.  Sometimes I lack patience for movies that, from the outset, look like they're trying to teach you something about life, about this crazy world of ours, that forcefeed you some kind of larger lesson.  Movies like Crash. 

What movies do you guys want to see right now?  For me, it's Blue Valentine all the way.  Thanks for the recommendation, Lauren.

On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me: La Condesa pork bel-ly.

Are there certain foods in your life that command strange powers over your thoughts and behavior?

Perhaps chocolate, or certain kinds of cheese?

Because for my husband, it is pork belly.  Out-of-town readers, do you like meat?  Then you will like Austin.  Pork belly -- and its pedestrian counterpart, bacon -- are kind of having a moment in our fair city right now.  We like it on sandwiches.  We like it plain.  We like it with chocolate.  Not even lying -- I've tried bacon inside chocolate gelato at our local Whole Foods.  Damn, that was good.

One restaurant that does pork belly particularly well is La Condesa.  I had lunch with a gaggle of food writers at La Condesa yesterday, and oh, how I wish I could have dragged Ross away from work!  He would have been in hog heaven with pork belly.

(Which ... now that I think about it.  Is probably "hog hell."  No?  Because they died to make the dish?  Metaphor failing to serve here?) 

Anyway.  I sort of hope he doesn't read this blog post.  It'll be too much pork belly envy.  Here are three of the items I tried today, listed on La Condesa's just-debuted lunch menu. 

betabel salad.

Oak-roasted beets, quinoa, toasted pumpkin seeds, shaved cotija, grilled citrus, pomegranate dressing.

cubanita sandwich.

Slow roasted pork belly, smoked Berkshire ham, arugula, Swiss cheese, habanero mustard, pickled jalapeños, toasted garlic.

veracruzana sandwich.

Salsa veracruzana, hard boiled egg, cotija cheese, pickled beets, radish, saffron aioli, greens.

*  *  *

From all the items above, I liked the last one, that sandwich, best. It tasted like a salad squeezed between bread: the beets, the hard-boiled eggs. Why haven't beets enjoyed a more exalted place in our culinary tradition? And by "our" I guess I mean "the world's." Because I'm not sure if any world cultures have celebrated the beet like I think it should be.

I love beets!

Something else to know about La Condesa.  They serve five different kinds of ceviche. Now I realize ceviche isn't very Fall-y.  And you might be in the mood to eat something heavier, something more suited to the season.  But please, promise me you'll try one someday?  My favorite is the "hamachi," made with yellowtail and grilled grapefruit broth.  Doesn't that sound exciting?  That's because it is.

Becoming a grown-up is disconcerting.

Note: What you're about to read is part of a writing project I'm working on outside of this blog.  But, since it concerns me and it concerns Austin, I thought I'd share part of it with you.  I vacillate on how much of this blog I want to dedicate to local happenings, and how much of it I want to dedicate to personal writing practice, but since you guys seem to be happy with both (I think), today I'm dishing up some of the latter.

I hope you enjoy!

*  *  *

Something is rotten in the state of Austin, Texas.

In a city that adores its messy youth, its sweaty guitarists and unshaven baristas, a 28 year-old girl is having the time of her life.  Dusting.

And that 28 year-old girl is me.

It hasn’t always been this way.  Once, I was messy too.  I’ve long viewed chores as a necessary evil. Laundry, for example, is a hurdle I simply never may cross.  I will put it off and put if off, until that one really sad moment, when I am close to tears in the middle of the heap, searching frantically for that one damn shirt.  A shirt that has already been worn several times.   I’m long past caring about said garment’s equivalent of an expiration date, but usually in these moments, nothing else is clean except for a sports bra and an old bridesmaid’s dress.  And folks, that combo simply won’t cut it for a trip to H-E-B.

I’ve reduced myself to this state so many times, forcing myself into the least-dirty outfit I happen to have on-hand (on-floor, rather), that I’ve begun to suspect it’s not accidental.  Not at all.

When I refuse to do the laundry, I believe it’s actually my way of proving to myself that I’m still young and irresponsible.   Like, look: I still make poor choices!  Maybe I’ll leave the cap off the toothpaste bottle next!   It’s not quite a cocaine addiction, but it’s something.

And yet. Some troubling incidents have given me pause.

Lately, I’ve been volunteering to vacuum clean.

In the past, I would try to pawn off this task on Ross through flattery, reminding him how good he is at scaring the cat with the vacuum cleaner.

“Here, I’ll shut all the doors in this room while she’s inside, and then you’ll come in and do all the cleaning,” I explain.

“And then when you’re all done, and only when you’re all done, we’ll watch her run away from the vacuum cleaner and it’ll be so funny!”

Ross would go along with it, but only out of pity.  Who wouldn't feel sorry for the inventor of that flimsy ruse?

Now, I can’t wait to clean the carpet.  I feel a holy satisfaction in the neat tracks the machine creates.  Before, I used to give a whole room a quick once-over, see a gigantic roach carcass in an impossible-to-reach corner, and whistle, “oh well!” before skipping off to watch reality television.   Last week, after spying a roach carcass (perhaps the same one from a year ago?), I actually turned off the vacuum cleaner, walked over to the closet, found the special attachment with the satisfyingly tiny nozzle, fastened it to the machine, sucked up the carcass, detached, put the attachment back in the closet, and continued with my room, just like a responsible person would do.  As if it were the most natural thing.  As if the Hoover Steam Vac Floor Attachment and I were old friends.

But vacuuming isn’t the only change.  When my mother phoned me the other day, I was having a moment with a can of Pledge.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“Dusting!!” I cried.  I might as well have said, “ice skating!!”   Meaning, the level of enthusiasm did not quite match the stated activity.

And here again, I’m left with questions.  Namely: Do all young Austinites experience an existential crisis when they learn they love to clean?

When I was in grad school in my early 20s, I was amused by the Truman Show level of lawn perfection in Davis, California.   Not a blade of grass out of place.   And in those lawns, children.  Good God, the children.  Children who always wore their bicycle helmet, children chased by the silkiest of golden retrievers, children inculcated into a very safe world of Dora the Explorer and organic milk.  It was the cleanest place I had ever seen outside of Switzerland, and for a time, I shucked off everything Texan in me and traded my motorist ways for a bicycle. I, too, joined the healthy, happy masses of Davis, California, going to the farmer’s market and proudly, aggressively not-polluting.

But deep down inside, I missed the mess of Austin.

It’s important to identify some key municipal forces here. Austin is a bit of a never-never land, where homeless transvestites can run for mayor with the best of ‘em. But more intriguingly, the city – much like its youth – encourages a little bit of unkemptness.

Proof: When a friend visiting me from California a couple of years ago, he pointed out our sidewalks.

“What exactly are we walking on, here?” he asked, stepping over a pile of rubble.

“This is a sidewalk,” I said.

“This would never happen in Sacramento,” he remarked.  And I had to agree, it wouldn’t.  I’ve seen Sacramento’s sidewalks, and they look great.  Austin’s look ok in places, too.  But could I walk to Sixth Street right now, and kick off a little piece of the Sixth/Brazos intersection with my foot?   Yes.  I’m confident I could do that.

When it comes to cultural markers, Texas in general is a contradiction in terms.  Is it the South?  Or is it the Wild West?  No one is sure.  Are we belles, or are we outlaws?  One thing is certain: We are a proud, viciously proud people.  Texas is the largest cult in the greater United States.  Have you ever seen more paraphernalia for a collective identity?  I doubt that you have.  Our cool shape is part of it, practically begging to be embroidered onto pillows.  But I also think Texans are bound by a “we’re all in this together” sort of limbo, where we’re not 100% clear on our heritage, but we know we have a heritage, dammit.  And by God we’re going to celebrate it.  Remember the Alamo!

And then … Austin.  Austin, to me, always seemed more lax in its Texas-ness, more embracing of a “live and let live” type of lifestyle, a town where I could be at peace with my sloppy, dirty-dishes-left-carelessly-in-the-sink ways.  It never occurred to me that, one day, I would be in the shower by myself, and use hair conditioning time not to relax and enjoy myself, but to manically scrub soap scum off the insides of the tub.

Who else would do that but a grown-up?

And then I realized: Like it or not, that’s what I am becoming.  A boring ass grown-up.

When twentysomethings – not just Austinites, but perhaps Brooklynites, Seattleites, the youth of Springfield, Missouri – realize they enjoy the responsible tasks they used to despise, when the eyes cease rolling in their sockets, when the groans catch in their throats, it is a deeply conflicting time.  We know it’s a slippery slope to 401k’s.  A mortgage.  A subscription to Consumer Reports.  What we don’t know is what awaits around the corner.  It could be a spouse, but it could also be orthopedic shoes.  There’s just no telling.

*  *  *

Note: I'm going to end this post here since it's getting a little long, but the whole thing goes on for a bit more.  If you want more then I'll post it, if not, thank you for reading!

Tonight: Handmade Music Austin & DIY Disco.

You have to love a pitch email that starts,

"Thanksgiving was only a week ago, Christmas is right around the corner, and everyone is looking for some disco to shake the pounds off."

Too true, emailer. Too true.

Anyway, this emailer was my buddy Dan, and tonight he is throwing a dance party featuring a couple of Austin "giznometers."

Bodytronix -- a duo comprised of Eric Archer and and Erich Ragsdale -- were recently featured on the cover of Austin Chronicle for Handmade Music, a local DIY electronics collective that teaches gadget-building classes.  From the piece:

"The four locals who make up the Handmade Music crew each have their own endeavors in gizmometry: Eric Archer's his own assembly line, churning out a dizzying number of one-time projects, like the electric gong and brainwave-controlled drum helmet...


Archer played in Numbers on the Mast and currently performs with Erich Ragsdale as Bodytronix, a DJ duo that came together through love of library music and disco and performs on things Archer's built, as well as vintage modified gear. They performed at Switched On during South by Southwest, chopping out beats like sushi chefs."

(If you have time to read the whole thing, it's a pretty great story.)

Here's a little vid about Handmade Music Austin, featuring Eric Archer.



If those Tetris beats are seizing your geeky heart like a little siren song, then go see Archer and Ragsdale do their Bodytronix thing tonight.

The hosts of the party, Flying Turns, kindly provided a link to one of their dance mixes, too.  I rarely post dance party stuff anymore, but damn!  This tasty!

Tonight, we are fancy ladies.

Pause. Let's take a moment, and appreciate the Beetlejuice jacket in front of the rack.

Do you love it?  I do.  I want to rock menswear harder, because I'm so damn girly, but I think that jacket is like gateway menswear. The shoulders aren't out too there, the colors are whimsical (if a bit traffic lighty), and you could pair it with quite a bit, given all that black.  It's throwback Gwen Stefani, no?

ANYWAY.  This is what happens when I pretend to be a fashion blogger!  I ramble.  These photos are a peek inside MOSS Designer Consignment, a new store opening up on South Lamar.  It's brought to you by the effortlessly stylish (and gosh-darn entrepreneurial) ladies of Feathers Boutique, Emily Hoover and Masha Harmeier.

Tonight, they are having a little party to celebrate the new store. With goodies.

The concept behind MOSS is sort of like Neiman's Last Call, with gently-used (sometimes not at all used) designer duds sold at a deal.  Tonight, they will be selling some of those wares at 25% off ticket price, with bubbly from King Liquor and cocktails from Tito's Vodka.

Because why just shop, when you can drink and shop?

In addition to the clothes, I'm going to stop by this party for another reason.  I really admire young women who start their own shops in their 20s and 30s like Emily and Masha have, be they vintage boutiques, coffee shops, food trailers, etc. because that seems VERY hard to me.  Do any of you harbor a similar fantasy?

Paging Whole Body Studio: We look like alligators

So, this is the time of year when my body starts to look less like a human, and more like a reptile's.  Poor Ross has to cuddle up with an iguana each night, because his wife has apparently never heard of lotion.  What I'm saying is, I have very dry skin.

You too?

I thought this would be a nice time of year to check with one of our Austin Eavesdropper sponsors, Whole Body Studio, and get -- as Cher in Clueless would say -- the 411 on spa treatments.

Below, Jennie advises me on what to buy for all the gay men in my life for the holidays, how to not make your face explode from Texas allergies, and why she left her boring desk job to, eventually, own her own spa.

*  *  *

1. Hi Jennie, welcome to Austin Eavesdropper! Tell us about Whole Body Studio.

Whole Body Studio opened in 2005. In June 2007, I landed a job as an aesthetician at Whole Body Studio. The former owner and I quickly became friends and soon I was not only taking clients, but also running the spa for her. My previous administrative background really came in handy!

In October 2007, I took ownership of the spa. I brought in a new chemical-free organic product line, expanded our spa menu and brought on a few new service providers. I also made Whole Body my first priority. I felt it was important that I be present as often as possible. I wanted my clients to get to know me and also give a “face and voice” to WBS. My focus has always been to provide natural, non-invasive services and treatments in a comfortable and inviting environment.


2. Why did you start this business?

I took ownership two years after it opened. In 2005, I was working in an office … bored and unstimulated.  It just wasn’t my calling.  I wanted to find something that excited me.

My then-boyfriend (now husband!) and I talked all the time about how there had to be something out there I could do, enjoy AND make a living. One day we were getting our hair cut together and chatting with the stylists about my lack of direction.  They asked me what I liked to do and I said, “Make people happy!” They suggested I go to beauty school to become an esthetician.  What??  I had never considered that!

I was skeptical.  Definitely skeptical.  But we started doing some research, visiting some schools and before I knew it, I was enrolled in a 9-month night program.


3. I've noticed you offer a LOT of products geared toward allergies, which hit us Austinites like the plague.  Whaddaya got in-store for that kind of thing?

Allergies!  It seems like everyone I know is suffering.  Whole Body Studio carries a line of herbal tinctures made by Ginger Webb of Texas Medicinals.  Taking an herbal tincture like Texas Allergy Relief, which actually contains ragweed, can help your body build a better (and more natural!) defense.

For raw noses and chapped lips we have Talulah Calendula Sensitive Healing Cream. It works like a charm to calm inflammation and soften all your rough patches, plus it smells divine and is completely chemical-free.


4. This time of year is joyful!  Bursting with holiday spirit!  And stressful.  So, what kind of soothing, relaxing treatments do you recommend for the holiday season?

Massage, facials, massage, facials ... and repeat.

Our therapists can customize an aromatherapy treatment for any massage.  Our facials are sooo relaxing.  Many clients tell me that they are just as relaxing as a full body massage.  I think any time you can relax and let go and really allow someone to employ the healing power of touch, you are bound to be relaxed!


5. Finally: I'm about to go gift-shopping.  I'm buying for girls, parents, and men. (Mostly gay men.) What do you recommend?

Our men’s packages are awesome! Our most popular packages for men include:

The Escape Traffic Package: The Urban Renewal Facial plus a 50-minute Custom Massage.  (100 minutes, $144)

The Big Date Package: The Urban Renewal Facial plus our signature Whole Body Back Treatment which includes cleansing, an enzyme peel, exfoliation, steam with extractions, toning and moisturizing.  (95 minutes, $144)

The Lake Austin Package: The Urban Renewal Facial plus back and shoulder waxing.  (80 minutes, $130)

We also carry an amazing chemical-free, organic line of skincare products from Talulah Natural Skincare. Talulah has a wonderful milk bath powder for sensitive skin and an aromatic body oil. They both make great gifts!

The Louise Package for women makes a great gift for girlfriends. Named after a cherished client who comes in for this package service once a month, “The Louise” includes a brow shaping, brow tint and lash tint.  Our aestheticians will expertly shape your brows and carefully blend the perfect shade of tint to accent and define your brows and lashes.  They have experience with complexions and hair colors of all shades and variations.  ($55)

thanks for stopping by austin eavesdropper, jennie!

5 ways to deal with social media fatigue.

My name is Tolly, I am a blogger, and I have a dark, shameful secret.

Sometimes, I don't like to blog.

Or Tweet. Or Facebook post. Or comment on other blogs.

Despite all evidence to the contrary, I actually toe a very fine line with my computer.  I love social media.  But sometimes it makes me anxious.  Overly neurotic.  And if I hit a certain "wall" of computer screen exposure, I have to detox for a few days.

As I'm sure you've noticed, the past few weeks on this blog were pretty much devoted to me promoting The Bleet-Up.  Those posts were punctuated by emails you didn't see, and Tweets or Facebook posts that maybe you did, drumming up buzz for our little party.  Fortunately, it paid off.  Our guests were good-time Glendas, our venue (Whole Foods rooftop) was totally decked out, and our Santa Clause was drunk.  I had an absolute blast, and if you attended, I hope you did, too. 

But.  It's the reason my blog has been blank for the past few days.

I think "fatigue" is something that social media users are afraid to talk about.  Hell, I am.

When you're building a little space on the internet, and slowly but surely, community happens inside that space, the last thing you want to do is confront the temptation to turn off the computer.  You think, "wait a second -- why is this happening?  I built up a little following, and now I'm just, I'm just, burnt out or something?  Do I fail at social media?"

*  *  *

When I was in elementary school, I would regularly eat too much Cinnamon Toast Crunch.  Like, Monday through Sunday Cinnamon Toast Crunch for breakfast (and sometimes after school snack) consumption, and when the box got empty, oh my God Mom, PLEASE BUY THE CINNAMON TOAST CRUNCH!  I was a little addict, jonesing for my next hit, whether it was poured properly into a cereal bowl or simply poured into my hand.  In most photographs of me from age six to eight, I have a maniacal, hellcat smile on my face; this was in part due to the amount of Cinnamon Toast Crunch coursing through my tiny body.

But one day, overnight, my tastebuds changed.

Suddenly, I did not want Cinnamon Toast Crunch. I wanted mini Eggo waffles. Or scrambled eggs.  Or anything, really, just as long as it wasn't those damn brown sugar-laden squares. The sight of that white box disgusted me, and those three cartoon, grinning Cinnamon Toast Crunch "chefs" on the front mocked my supreme dissatisfaction. Their cereal had no place on my spoon. No place in my life.

Eventually, after a long enough retreat into the solemn, colorless world of Cheerios ... I would return back to my Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

I had just needed a break.  That was all.

And that is what it is like, with me, and maybe you, and social media.

*  *  *

Like I said, I think "fatigue" may be a dirty word for social media users.  Especially here in Austin. We're wired, baby!  We're like the top American city for bloggers!

And on a collective level, that's a serious accomplishment.

But on an individual level, it's inevitable that you'll crave unplugged time.

I say, listen to that craving.  I don't know about you, but I need experiences in my life that are un-Tweeted, that are just mine to keep. When I've been swimming in social media for so long, though (it's also a big part of my day job), sometimes I don't know how to get back.

So here are the offline ways I restore balance, and ease social media fatigue:

1. I remember what I blog about. Which for me is Austin. I shut my laptop, and go on a freaking walk. Sometimes I cheat and take my phone (which has Twitter), but it's always better when I don't. To experience my environment directly and unfiltered, without feeling compelled to "report" it.

Foodies have it the best, I think. When they remember why they blog, they return to their muse with all five senses. And that's the point I'm getting at, here: To devote your whole body, or as much of it as you can, to the thing that inspired you to blog in the first place.  Social media gets you caught up inside your head; rich smells, interesting things to see and touch, other people's voices, etc. get you out of it.

2. Read things that are not on the internet.  For example, a book.  I know that many of us are obsessive readers.  Long-form reading material offers a different kind of satisfaction than the quick hits of Twitter or your Facebook homepage, no?  It's a repetitive action, and lulls me into a type of meditation.  It also makes me forget about 'me' for a while, while social media does the opposite (i.e., unchecked, it can make my ego go berzerk.  'Ego' has many definitions but this is the one I'm using here).

3. Buy a Christmas tree with somebody.  Or, cook with somebody.  The key word is "somebody." One of the ironies of social media is that so much of it happens in physical isolation, and when I find myself going through long stretches where I haven't done many things with other people, i.e. activities other than nodding to one another at work, why, it's time to go drinking!  Or go see something at Alamo Drafthouse together, or coerce them into trying a Salty Oat cookie at Quacks, or volunteer together or play with dogs or whatever it is you do that not only rocks your socks, but can be shared.

(Speaking of coercion, I just found out that I successfully wife-shamed Ross into throwing away our plastic Christmas tree sometime last Spring, a fact he did not reveal to me until Monday, when we TOTALLY WENT REAL CHRISTMAS TREE SHOPPING TOGETHER. I am unreasonably passionate about real Christmas trees, and now, the house smells all piney and forest-y!!  Pat on back, self).

4. Call my mom or dad.  As in, I teach myself how to use the phone again. I've discussed phone anxiety before, and I think social media overload is part of the equation for many of us. We get so used to typing, editing, re-typing our little computer messages that the relative spontaneity of phone-speak seems ... bizarre.  "Is that silence I hear on the other end?" you think, when the other person has merely paused to take a breath. "Um, they are being quiet? WHY ARE THEY BEING QUIET!?"

This is what happens when you are used to an unending stream of Twitter messages. When it's just one-on-one, you and another person, chances are, the conversation will hit natural pauses. I used to think that phone silence = prompt for me to giggle or make a joke, but now I see that that's just my way of displacing nerves. It's ok to be nervous about phone silence, but it's also ok to keep experiencing it, until you get to the point where you're like, "oh, this is how people talk!  We sometimes just don't know what to say."  Because sometimes, you don't.  And that's kind of nice, that you're both vulnerable together.  I think it builds intimacy.

5. Go to the places I've always wanted to go but haven't yet.  God, there are so many in Austin!  Would you believe I haven't seen the freaking bats yet?  There's one.  Here are more:

-South Austin Museum of Popular Culture
-Sustainable Food Center for one of their Local Food Potlucks
-Chaparral Ice (totally serious)
-Tranarchy
-Stitch Lab for sewing classes, where I have wanted to go ever since Indiana talked about it on Adored Austin.

*  *  *

So now, I would love to hear from you.

Bloggers, Tweeters, other social media users: Do you ever experience social media fatigue?


If yes, how do you deal?

Happy Bleet-Up Day!

Oh I love you, Hipstamatic.

Tonight is the big night!! Richard and I are SO EXCITED to show you everything we've put together for this special occasion.  And I know you bloggers are pumped about Republic of Austin's Austin Blogger Awards, being presented tonight at The Bleet-Up too.

A few TIPS to ensure your Bleet-Up experience is absolutely grand:

1. Arrive early!  Doors are at 7:00pm.  Last year at Mohawk there were lines, and nobody likes lines. Plus...

2. Beer!  Live Oak Brewery will be there tonight.  And if you get there early you will be happy you did!  Early arrivals drink free beer 'til it runs out, then we switch over to cash bar ($3/cup).

3. BYOAwesome. This is the cool thing about partying on top of a grocery store. While our kegs and bands will say goodbye to you at 10:30pm, the party will continue long after that on the roof.  So if you'd like to grab a beer, a six-pack, a bottle of wine, etc. from the regular store part of WF and bring it upstairs to enjoy past 10:30, that is a-ok my friend.   Just grab it before store close -- 10:00 -- and you're all set.

PS. I think Whole Foods sells single-serve champagne in a pink can. If so I'm definitely getting it.

4. Have a BLAST. Seriously. Richard and I saw the Whole Foods terrace last night y'all, and it's ridonkulous. By which I mean, totally gorgeous and beautiful. We are so grateful to have Whole Foods host this for us!

I know my levels of enthusiasm are getting obnoxious at this point.  But really, it's so surreal to me that The Bleet-Up TONIGHT.  Totally cray cray!  You'll see many bloggers, blog readers out there, and friendly faces out there tonight, and here is a small sampling.

Come find me and say hi to me when you get there. I promise to be smiling.

see you tonight!

THIS SATURDAY: Dogs, it's your time to shine.

This is the kind of thing that makes me wish we had a dog!  But we'll settle for our cute, yet evil, cat.

So post Bleet-Up, there is yet more fun to be had this weekend. Scamps and Scoundrels: An Urban Dog Challenge, benefiting Austin Pets Alive!, is this Saturday here in Austin, and it sounds totally fun. Basically, registered teams do a scavenger hunt / relay race of sorts around Austin.  Team are made up of dogs and people. They complete challenges together, and at the end of the race, they go to a huge party at the new Austin Pets Alive! building at Manchaca and South Lamar.

(Did you catch that?  People partying WITH dogs. This probably happens only in Austin. God I love my city.)

A group of rockstar women here in town put this whole thing together: Blair Smith and Alesha Mathews of Dirty Dog, and publicist / event planners Sarah K. Wolf and Beth Bellanti. All are avid dog lovers. I may or may not have a girl crush on all.

If you haven't registered yet dog owners and lovers, you may do so here.

I spoke with Claudia about pretending to be a dog, and doing these fun relays together on Saturday.  I said, "hey Claudia, for a good cause, let's work together here. Be a team player." This is how she reacted.